Losing....The Q-Tip Way

I have some friends who used to call me the Q-tip. Well not really a q-tip really since nothing about me was ever that skinny before. But the shape of my body is something to discuss. Somewhere up there, God thought it would be funny to shape me like a q-tip. Big on top, small on the bottom.

While I was fat though, it wasn't extremely noticeable. I mean really, being that big on top overshadowed any semblance of shape I had on the bottom. Who had time to notice my slender (ok, skinny) legs when my boobs entered the room and attracted attention.
Now that I'm losing, the q-tip phenomenon is becoming more apparent. Don't get me wrong, being able to buy a pair of pants from Ann Taylor that were a size 6!!!! was one of the highlights of the month. Didn't expect to get that small, but nevertheless, the top is no where near a 6. Not trying to make my torso feel left out, I've definitely lost inches and dress sizes up there too. I've managed to get both halves of my body out of Lane Bryant....etc.

My Q though, is taking its time giving up the extra cushion. My arms, my boobs, my stomach, are diminishing slowly, but hanging on for dear life. Maybe its seen what's happened to my bottom and is protesting the famine. Who knows, but whatever it is it isn't right. Which makes dressing kinda tricky.

Each morning I'm caught between 2 dilemnas. Wear a baggy bottom that'll camaflauge the legs and non existent booty, to actually semi-match my top. Or wear a snug fitting top that'll cut off the circulation in my boobs, and declare how many rolls of stomach I still have, to match my slender bottom half. Makes dressing a 30 minute affair each morning. I'm perservering though, trying to focus on the overall self confience, but losing a bit of it each time I'm getting called LA at work (LA, not because I'm beautiful like the weather in Los Angeles, but LA meaning "LITTLE ANKLES!") I actually do find it a bit funny.

In the grand scheme of things, I guess a 2:1 ratio isn't that bad, when its a difference between 18:12 and 12:6. (That's sizes for those of you who got lost in the math and forgot the focus of the blog) I'm proud, but worried. Worried about my upcoming cruise and the month before when I finallly have to buy my swimwear (or dipping toes in the water wear, since I can't swim!) Two pieces are out. My experience and war wounds left over from cancer solved that problem for me. I'm more concerned about trying to fit a one piece bathing suit, when I look like Dolly Parton up top, and one of those anorexic models on the bottom.

So while all you proportionate people are taking 2 minutes in the morning to throw on a fab outfit, think of me trying to do the "create a figure" dance with my outfits. I have a new hope for this month. So far the tip of my Q has dropped off dramatically. Not trying to end up an ironing board, but hoping that the running, walking, Shape twisting Pilates, crunches, death ball exercises, carrot eating, water drinking, planning meals, weights, pushups, more carrot eating, routine that has become my life, will start to affect the Q in my tip!